Ground Work

You need to make time for an affair. Your family knows your routine. They know when you leave in the morning and when you come home at night. Without making a point of it, start changing your schedule slowly to build up your credibility. Be honest in your answers! Don’t lie because there is no need to lie. Get used to answering calmly and to the point. There is no reason to be nervous because you are not lying!

Keep Things Normal

What Comes First You may feel guilty about your passionate hours away from home and have a compulsion to “make up for lost time” with the family. Take it easy. There’s no need to overcompensate. Take this quick test. If you don’t answer YES to all of the following, you need to think again about having an affair and reprioritize your focus and activities. • Do you always make sure that the family comes first? • Do you and your lover accept the fact that either of you may have to go home sooner, or may suddenly call off a rendezvous altogether, because you are needed at home? • You try not to overcompensate the kids with extra toys or paint their bedroom to show you care. Read the book for more.

Money Matters

It Matters If It’s Not on Hand Having an affair costs money. If you don’t have one already, it’s time to open your own bank account. This makes it easier to have cash on hand and to adjust your own accounts. Men may want to pay most of the expenses of an affair, out of sheer excitement. Women may want to go Dutch out of common courtesy or self-esteem. Either way, go with the flow, but make sure no one feels used. Additional money is also important because when having an affair, you’ll need to buy some extras (See Chapter 5 “Perfumes, Makeup and New Clothes”), for inflated telephone bills, extra gas for the car, parking fees, day-use charges, or fare for a cab. Read the book for more.

Places to Meet

There Aren’t Any This isn’t a joke. Unless your lover is single and lives alone you’ll have nowhere to go! Fooling around in the back seat of a car can be fun and exciting in the beginning but after a while it feels sleazy and you will resent it. Before you find a decent place to meet, you may only be able to share a few short moments together in some place off the beaten path. Do your best to stay away from areas that are unfamiliar to you, yet be on the lookout for safe, deserted fields or sites that could fit the bill. But check them out before going there at night. Read the book for more.